Same story here. And I fucked so many girls I can't even count them. Every time I try counting I forget someone... Most of those girls I didn't really care that much about. There were a few I loved, or at least I thought I loved, but mostly it was just me having fun. I wasn't an asshole at all, almost always tried not to hurt anyone's feelings. In fact most of them would gladly fuck me again today and I do get an occasional message from some of those ex, telling me they'd love to hook up again. I also did some things I'm not that proud of, there was this one girl that I really used just as a cum dumpster, but to be honest, she wanted that. I fucked other men's girlfriends and wives. I fucked two girls at once. I also fucked one girl with my friend several times. I fucked a cousin. I fucked my godfather's daughter and broke her heart. Shit, I did a lot of crazy things with a lot of people.
But all that meaningless sex also has me wondering where I'm heading. I have a girlfriend now, but I'm having a hard time keeping my cock in my pants. She's great, a perfect ideal of a woman as far as I'm concerned. She's a great person, great friend, great cook, fantastic in bed, totally willing to do whatever I want, she dresses up for me in these latex suits, she let's me fuck her in the ass... It's all great. But still, I find myself fantasizing about other women, about my ex girls, about whoever I happen to notice. I try not to act on those wishes, but still - they're there. I can't deny it.
And while this will sound super lame, I do love her. And I do care about her. I try my best to keep her happy, to show her my affection, she's not being left aside at all. But every once in a while, my demons come back and I just start plotting how to fuck some other girl. I don't do it though. But when an unplanned chance presented itself a year ago, I just couldn't say no. I had met this super slutty and super hot chick, she's a model and she was all dressed up in leather and lace and before I had a chance to think, I've fucked her brainless 3 times in a row. It was just sex, no emotion at all. Well, unless you count her begging me to spank her and assfuck her an emotion... I still feel shitty about it, but I try not to think. Few months ago I met a girl on a business trip, we hit it off in a matter of minutes and I ended up fucking her as well.
Now an opportunity presented itself to fuck an absolute A+ girl, very young, very hot, very everything. She looks like a total pornstar and for some reason wants to fuck me. And now I'm caving again. I know it's bad, I know I shouldn't, but I'm telling myself "just this once, I can't pass this one up".
And this is how stuff is in my life... Fuck.
