op here....it really wasn't a full choice to adopt. yes i control my own actions but i really was doing it to save the marriage. big mistake. i told my ex i wasn't ready for that and she snapped. what would you guys do in my case? i never really stated 1 thing and done another. my ex works for a church and has this perception she is sin free and was making me go to counseling cause i looked at porn during the marriage. not constant porn just a little here and there when she would go a month or more without giving it up. just before she decided to kick me out i found her secret email account where she had been having an affair for some time.
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